Cooking Baking Eating

Sometimes I shock myself with the random things that I do. They really make me question just how completely awesome I am. I know I’m pretty awesome at cooking, sewing, wielding the camera, and navigating the overall strangeness of life, but there are things that I am NOT awesome at.

Like I am not awesome at keeping myself from doing stupid things. The stupid things that I’m talking about include being so frustrated because I cannot find my car keys and later realize I was holding them in my hand all along, or losing my shoes in the morning (my husband loves that one, its almost a daily occurrence). Even forgetting to take my seatbelt off before getting out of the car and ending up flailing my arms as I’m tangled in my seatbelt while hanging half out of the car.

That was pretty awesome for those watching, I assume. However, as of the other night I have a new “awesomeness” I can add my long list of weirdness.

I set my oven on fire.

Yes oh yes I did. Six inch flames and smoke billowing up from the bottom of my oven. And the odor was horrendous. It was like a mix between burnt marshmallows and soy sauce. This is not the odor you want in your oven as you’re trying to make a double batch of your super awesome cookies for the company picnic on Saturday.

So what makes this odor and which lead to flames? Roasting a sweet potato.

Yep, stupid sweet potato.

I was trying to roast some sweet potatoes ahead of time so I could make some hash in the morning and not spend a whole lot of time on it, but since I’ve been having trouble getting my smaller russet potatoes to cook all the way in the oven, I wrapped the much larger sweet potatoes in some foil to help them steam a bit inside (a trick I’ve done previously for making baked potatoes). One and a half hours later this horrible smell starts coming from the kitchen. The sweet potatoes ended up turning to a pudding-like consistency and dripping sticky sweet liquid out them and onto the bottom of the oven.

Fail.

We scraped out the bottom the oven and got enough off the bottom that we didn’t think it would be an issue, but boy were we wrong. While the oven was preheating for cookies I noticed the smell again. I opened the oven and on the bottom were these giant black foamy looking things where the remaining sweet potato liquid was.

Right in the middle of the heating elements of the oven. Crap.

So I turn the oven off and grab my spatula to knock down the blobs from the elements and of course, they catch on fire in the mean time.

Sigh. Just my luck.

Luckily I don’t even think of freaking out. All I think is “you stupid flames!” and proceed to whap at them with the spatula until the flames die out and all I’m left with are the burning charcoal embers of evil sweet potato goo. I pick them up with the spatula and fling them, red glowing embers and all, into the sink. I then proceed to pout and grumble as I wait for the oven to cool down before I scrub it out with some baking soda and vinegar (awesome oven cleaner, but wait until the oven is cool, hot vinegar sucks to breathe in).

The funny part? My husband was oblivious. He had shut himself in his office and was making phone calls while listening to music. He didn’t even find out until much later in the night after he started smelling the cookies cooking and came to investigate, only to find a rather disgruntled and tired wife in the kitchen.

This whole drama pushed back my cookie baking time by over an hour, but the good thing about doing a vegan cookie recipe is that the batter won’t spoil or the butter won’t get too melty and ruin the batter if it sits on your counter for a while.

You can even eat it right out the bowl without any worry about salmonella since there aren’t any eggs to ruin your day. These cookies are almost idiot proof, unless you go and set your oven on fire…

The other nice thing about these cookies is that you can make them vegan or not so vegan. I don’t keep alternative milk in the house so I just used cows milk and they turn out great.

Peanut Butter Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Vegan Cookies
Makes a few dozen, I didn’t count them, I was too traumatized by the fire.
Originally found at Neo-Homesteading

• 2 cups flour (whole wheat would taste great!)
• 2 cups old fashioned oats
• 2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon
• 3/4 cup peanut butter (chunky also would work, I used smooth)
• 1 cup sugar
• 1 cup brown sugar
• 3/4 cup canola or vegetable oil
• 1/2 cup milk (cow or alternative work the same)
• 2 teaspoons vanilla (cut in half if using vanilla flavored alternative milk)
• 2 cups chocolate chips

Directions:

1. Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.
2. In one bowl whisk together the dry ingredients (flour through cinnamon) until combined.
3. In a second larger bowl beat the peanut butter and sugars together until combined. Add the remaining liquid ingredients and mix.
4. Mix the dry ingredients into the wet ingredients in two batches, making sure to scrape the bottom of the bowl. Add the chocolate chips last.
5. Scoop the batter into tablespoon sized balls and place 2″ apart on a lightly greased (or use parchment) cookie sheet.. It will be a bit crumbly but just smoosh it together to make it hold or they could crumble apart while cooking and look a bit funny.
6. Bake 13-16 minutes or until golden brown. Let the cookies cool for a few minutes on the cookie sheet before moving them.